So today is pay day. I am actually happy about it but at the same time, I just look at it like, "sheesh, what ELSE do I have to take care of with this paycheck?" You know what I mean? I have to get new brakes on the Mommy Mobile (my '98 Dodge Grand Caravan that has been abused and loved and then abused again LOL). New brake pads and rotors and a leak in the rear caliber, blah, blah, blah. Which all means MONEY!!! So I will do it 'cause I sure would like to keep getting a check and so I will do what is necessary.
You know, if I didn't have my car, I would have to leave my house (and my kids) at 7:15 every morning to catch the bus to get to work at 8:30 am, and then leave work at 5 pm to get home by about 6:15. Now that isn't too bad considering that I worked all the way in downtown Manhattan for about 7 months last year and it took me 1-1/2 hours on the train in the morning and the same at night just to get home! That was some crazy mess, let me tell you! Add to that, being UNDERGROUND for about an hour of that! Uh, no thank you! Made a sista start getting anxiety attacks, for real! The NYC subway system is the most extensive in the world but believe me, it is has to be the most frustrating when it comes down to simple logistics, but for the sheer volume of people it transports, it's fine. I just don't like having to deal with it on a day to day basis anymore. I value being able to get home at a decent time. Leaving work at 5 and getting home by 5:30 is good in my book, as opposed to leaving work at 5:30 and getting off the train at 7, and then the 10 minute walk to my house. No Comparison!!!
So, let me tell you a little bit about myself: I have 3 kids, 16, 13 and 9.
My first born is currently living with my sisters because she thought she was grown and I had to show her that she will never be as grown as me, no matter how old she gets. We definitely have a strained relationship. One day, it will get better, I know this in my heart, but right now is not the time. I send money to support her, my sisters give me updates on her, but she and I do not speak.... For now.
My son is my STAR. I always had a problem with women who were overprotective of their sons and smothered them and stuff, but now that he is getting older, I find that I understand it more and more. He is the future. A "strong black man in training" and his path can be redirected at anytime if I don't step in frequently to check for the "troll under the bridge" and the lost souls travelling near him. We live in the projects and although my complex is relatively calm, it has had it's share of violence and I easily see where things could go badly. I want to keep him firm and steady. He is definitely getting there too. I take credit for a lot of it but I do have to give credit to my sweetheart, who I will talk about another time.
My youngest baby girl is my heart! She is my road dog, my ace, my little buddy. She feels my pain, she builds me up... she completes me! Ok, maybe I went a little too far with that one, but she is special. She is also my moodiest child! Goodness, anyone got a LEO in their life? Sheesh, back and forth, 'swing low, sweet chariot', give me a break! She is a good kid, and considerate, and I like that about her.
Ok, let me ACT like I am working, since I am here at work, right? I will talk to y'all later. Have a blessed day!
(yes those are my kids, ain't they beautiful?)